Most of my adult life I was told, “You can’t have fear and faith at the same time.” It made sense to me during the times when I was at peace and not bound by fear, however, during those moments of fear when I would be told that “I can’t have fear and faith at the same time, waves of condemnation would consume me and I would start to question. “What is wrong with me?” Why do other people seem to have rational thoughts and here I am overcome by fear?” In my early adult life I was on a mission to change everything about myself. The filters that produced this action were fear, trauma, and incorrect beliefs I had about myself that manifested from fear and perpetuated self-doubt, a lack of confidence and a pattern of wavering whenever it seemed less painful and more fun. Even as I began to explore a relationship with Jesus, I was influenced by “fitting in” to clicks. I was constantly setting aside what my heart was telling me and guiding me to do, for an illusion of acceptance. This only continued to manifest fear and the “I will never be good enough voice”. Over the last few years Kurt and I have been on such an amazing journey. For the first time in our lives we have embraced freedom the way we believe God intended for it to be all along. Instead of our lives being guided by outside influences and looking for where we belong, we are fanning the feelings our hearts have produced and through that, we have begun to experience His perfect love.
“Love is not defined by our love for God, but by his love for us! It is not our response to God that attracts his attention; we have always had his undivided affection as declared in the prophetic promise and finally demonstrated in his Son’s commission and work of atonement for our sins.” -1John 4:10 MBT
I know Kurt and I are not unique in this. I believe that anyone who is reading this now, as you open up your hearts as the filter, many of the things that you thought were cognitively true would be discerned as false and would not match the true character of God. It’s not out of arrogance that we are sharing this. The water of life is not bitter…it is sweet!! If we get a bitterness in our hearts from what is being taught we simply check our filter. New wine has to go into new wine skin…It certainly doesn’t mean that we are falling into the swells of darkness that are in this world. Once I began to get God’s perspective and see that darkness is simply the absence of light and not a demonic influence or control, I began to be able to breathe more deeply. His light began to naturally shine into all areas of darkness my shallow breaths had been protecting. I believe we tend to protect the darkness for a few reasons. First, if it has been with us for a long time, we become comfortable with it and the idea that we can let light diffuse the fear is scarier than the agony of continuing to walk in it. Secondly, shame stirs us and our own self-righteousness keeps it locked up. If we were ever truly exposed, we may lose everything we have, friendships, relationships, status etc… Those thoughts appear to be justified because they are filtered through fear. Again, all I have is my experience. I know that when I began to see Christ in ALL things and began to trust my heart I began to believe what the scriptures said. “Now the decisive conclusion is this: in Christ, every bit of condemning evidence against us is cancelled.” -Romans 8:1 MBT.
The Gospel is not that you have asked Jesus Christ into your heart. The Gospel is Jesus accepted you into His life, at the foundation of the world and is seated face to face with God the Father and the Holy Spirit. Truth cannot be filtered through fear. Truth can only manifest when we know His love for us, and when we begin to believe and experience all the freedom that He has for us. “This is final: I have deleted the record of your sins and misdeeds. It is not possible to recall them. (Hebrews 10:17) How beautiful is that really, that He doesn’t see the wrong beliefs we have (sin) that produce the actions we do (lawless deeds) His love is so much that “His perfect love casts out all fear!” “Become fully acquainted with his gift in you, there is nothing timid about it; the dynamic of a mind liberated in the spirit of love is fearless and unstoppable.” -2 Timothy 1:7 MBT. Beginning to experience this relationship tangibly, our hearts begin to guide us and we truly are unstoppable because it is His Spirit that guides us. Humanity begins to look brighter because it is not about us and them, behaviors, or anything that we tend to see people do that places them in a box that needs to be “saved” rather, it becomes Christ’s heartbeat in us echoing this. “So God created human beings in his own image. In the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.” -Genesis 1:27 NLT. Our life experience becomes, “In us God desires to exhibit the priceless treasure of this glorious unveiling of Christ’s indwelling; in order that every nation will recognize him as in a mirror! The unveiling of Christ in you exceeds mankind’s every expectation!” -Colossians 1:27 MBT.
The promise land is not looking to heaven as our final resting place where there will be no more tears, only light and love. We believe that is the future glory. However, we believe God intended for us to meet with Him in the garden just as Adam and Eve did before their wrong belief separated them from the way God has always seen them. God made a way back in the garden. The promise land is our hearts. Our hearts are the only way to fully experience His glory here and now. His heartbeat in all humanity is the doorway that He is knocking on. All of God’s creation has the ability to receive His love and experience the promise land hear and now. When we see ourselves loved and truly know that nothing in heaven, on earth or below the earth can separate us from the love He has for us, our spiritual eyes of understanding begin to open and we begin to look inward where He is and has been from the foundation of time. He’s sitting in our heart waiting for us to grow in friendship, love and understanding with the triune God of all Creation. You are all surnamed “I Am”. In Him you are all things. Our hope for everyone reading this is that you all begin to experience life with your heart, knowing that in His love fear cannot reside. Wrong belief produces fear, anxiety, stress, anger, addictions, mental and physical illnesses. Believing the Father, the Holy Spirit, and Jesus are pure love and purifying light kills wrong belief at the root and this manifests into the freedom we have to be who we were created to be. The children of the Father and the Holy Spirit and Jesus’s bride. We are their masterpiece. Fear by the English definition is NOT where we reside. Fearing an angry God, or fear of situations in our life that can be paralyzing have never been truth, and never will be. His love casts out ALL fear and filters His glory into every aspect of our life. Wow…. just think of what a sweet fountain that is that we drink from!
“The Spirit finds expression in love, joy, peace, endurance, kindness, goodness, faith, gentleness, self-control. Legalism can neither match nor contradict this. There is no law against love!” – Galatians 5:22-23 MBT
The light of the world lives in all of creation, from the simplest life form to God’s perfect masterpiece, all of mankind. Everyone, male and female, from every region of the world is an expression of this Love. God the Father, the Holy Spirit and Jesus are love. The creation is from this family’s love. We are the offspring of Love, we are not the offspring of hate or fear. Jesus came to reconcile all of us to this truth, and whether we believe it in the here and now or not. Nothing separates us from this love. There is NO torture chamber for any of God’s creation. The light we live in is for ALL eternity. When we begin to live in this light it is the moment we believe The Father, the Spirit, and Jesus all love us with-out conditions.
Jesus is the TREE of LIFE, he is the fruit we eat and the well we drink from that shows us the Fathers love. He is not a husband who demands us to serve him. He served us for our freedom from the darkness of wrong belief. “In total contrast to the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, the tree of life bears fruit effortlessly consistent with the life of our original design” -Francois Du Toit
“The Spirit and the bride say, “Come.” Let anyone who hears this say, “Come.” Let anyone who is thirsty come. Let anyone who desires drink freely from the water of life.” -Revelation 22:17 NLT.
Blessings in Love,
Katy & Kurt
- NLT: New Living Translation.
- MBT: Mirror Bible Translation.
One thought on “Out of Darkness and Into the Light. ”
Katy and Kurt, every time I read anything from you, I am just so amazed at the love and wisdom that eminates from such a young couple. There is a smoothness within each phrase that calms a “nervous thoughtlife”. Not only smooth, but a warm blanket that promises to care for and show genuine concern to the reader.
Oh, How I enjoyed the journey with this excerpt of your growth. Thank you for sharing your ever growing outlook of God’s love, to
and through and in each of us.
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